Jackie Danicki

Tonight, I was lucky enough to spend several hours with Adriana. I’ve never had a female friend I could argue with so forcefully and with whom I could still remain such good friends. (That said, I can’t remember our last big argument. Must start one soon.) Somewhat dimly, because it is fairly obvious, I realised tonight that Adriana really groks me.

Grok (IPA /gɹɑk/ (GA) or /gɹɒk/ (RP), both rhyming with rock) is a verb that connotes knowledge greater than that which can be sensed by an outside observer. It is an understanding beyond empathy and intimacy. In grokking, one experiences the literal capabilities and frame of reference of the subject.

“Understanding beyond empathy and intimacy”. I hope I do not need to tell you that connecting with someone who has that level of knowledge - someone with whom you swiftly developed your own shorthand language and who almost instinctually gets the context of who you are, what you do, and what you believe - is extremely precious. Spending time with such a person is also the most healthy (hell, the only healthy) form of relaxation I have at my disposal. To be able to let go, to feel free from the expectation of explanation, and to feel totally accepted and understood…well, the glow that gives me sure beats any TV show or movie I’ve ever seen.

If there is someone in your life who really gets you, you might want to let them know how much they mean to you. Sure, they probably realise it, but it’s always nice to have the affirmation. You can also earn bonus points by embarrassing them with a blog post about it. (Like I said, she and I haven’t fallen out for a while…)

Filed under: Life