Work/life balance quote of the day
Posted on May 11th, 2008 by Jackie Danicki
If you treat work and life as mutually exclusive things, then you should not be surprised to have a work-life balance problem.
-JP Rangaswami says all that and more worth reading in a cracking post.
Filed under: Life
I like the post, except perhaps for the beginning, when Rangaswami claims not to understand how the phrase “life/work balance” came into being. I’ve never actually heard someone use this phrase, perhaps because I work at home and thus am responsible for that “balance.” I’ll wager a lot of people working in new media/tech get to make a lot of decisions about where they spend their time, and when.
That said, I’ll wager a majority of the world’s population isn’t that crazy about they do to put bread on their families’ tables, whether it’s harvesting rice, or working in a factory, or scraping the barnacles off ships, or answering phones. I recently saw a video of boys trying to sell roasted rats (as a snack) to tourists as a means to survival. These folks probably want to go home and not think about work.
I do believe every human has the ability to mesh the parts of their lives to feel, as Rangaswami does, that they’re constantly “on holiday.” And it’s arguable that it’s all in the approach; that one can feel joy when washing dishes — and actually, I do. But opportunity has quite a lot to do with our choice to feel in balance, and creating that opportunity, for many, is a long hard, sometimes highly improbable slog.
Sorry for any snotty tone here, but boy do I get sick of hearing this hoo-ha. Usually from career counselors who escaped their nasty prior jobs (real jobs) to lecture employees, lawyers, MBAs, etc. on how to Break Free! Dance Like No One Is Watching!, Find Their Bliss!! Wheee!
OH COME ON.
Life and work are exclusive. In order to live, we have to work. That does not mean the work is what we are. It’s just something we have to suck it up and do. Somedays you love it, somedays you hate it, but it is not who and what you are. It is what you do to live a comfortable and responsible life. Come to think of it, sucking it up is a big part of being a responsible adult - you don’t have to love everything, but you sure as hell have to not cause harm, live up to the promises you have made to others, and leave the world in a neutral or better place. Not always joyful for you, but your feelings don’t matter (that’s where the suck it up part comes in again).
MJ, I’m sorry you feel that way. I can only say that you speak for yourself. My attitude to work is much like JP’s, but only after intense de-programming to get past the work mentality I was raised with, which was: Work is not supposed to be fun. Work is supposed to be a drag. It’s one of the most damaging ideas I was indoctrinated with, and I have huge resentments about the fact that I was (in case you couldn’t tell!).
Believe me, I’m in the vast majority. Maybe this work = play thing is a new economy or tech idea - there are numerous people, in jobs ranging from blue collar to multi-degreed professions, who work out of duty and are not happy about it all the time - but someone has to do these jobs and they must be done properly, well and responsibly - individual feelings don’t matter until things are competently wrapped up. I don’t think that I have ever met anyone in my life who professes to have integrated work and life and feels that way about work - I don’t think this exists in my profession or region.
I see your point about upbringing, though. I work next to a government retiree consultant who drives me INSANE with his 1950s pronouncements on how one must have one job for life - a la going to “Fords” Motor Co or the bank in 1950 and retiring from the same place - and how all of this entreprenurial stuff is nuts. Thank you, welcome to 1980. I have the countervailing tendency to see anything like “work = joy or play” as nutty, flaky, and one of those 20 something ideas Penelope Trunk is trying to get rich off of shilling. Damn it people, pull up your socks, grow up, and do your frakking jobs - and do them well every time! You’ll have time for yourself on some evenings and weekends, suck it up!
Different worldviews.